Friday, April 30, 2010
Question #2
My girlfriend and I are always having these mixed conflicts where one of us will have to give up their time to spend with the other. For example, I had just come back from a long day of class and the first thing is that I get greeted by my husky. Being gone for so long, I decided he needed to get some much needed exercise, so I tell her that I’m bringing him to the dog park. She argues that she hasn’t seen me all day and she wants to spend time also. We came to a decision that she would come walk my husky with me so he could get some exercise and we would be spending time with each other as well. There’s not always going to be a time where we make compromises for a win-win situation. That is where things start getting complicated and only one person will get what they want and one with not (win-lose). When you’re not the victorious one on competitive conflict, its pretty degrading giving up what you want, but you keep in mind for the next time that it won’t be the same case.
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Oh, yes, I know how this is. My boyfriend and I spend a lot of time together, but the problem we have is he has a Monday through Friday, 9-5 job, whereas I go to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and work on the weekends. On top of that we both live at home, so we don't get to stay with each other often. Our biggest conflict is balancing time that we see each. Since my time is more limited than his, I have to get in seeing him and my friends, which sometimes causes conflicts as to what we're going to do. What I've learned is that if we understand that we can't spend as much time as we would like together, but that doesn't mean we don't love each other any less, makes it easier to deal with.
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